I was part of the corporate world for close to 20 years. The everyday journey felt like being on a treadmill where the button to slow down the speed was simply never there. Not that I did not enjoy it! The daily grind and fire-fighting gave an adrenaline rush, a sense of validation – self-worth. But it came with a cost. I literally had no time for myself. Family vacations got interrupted by unscheduled meetings or adhoc projects, I did everything with a smile, till I reached the brink of saturation, pushing me to hang in my boots. 

During my notice period, I imagined spending every minute of my time doing the things that gave me pleasure. Going on long leisurely walks, reading, writing, exercising, spending time with my daughter and the list went on and on…  

Believe you me, I could not do any of these for the first year of my break. I would mull and miss the grind and the sense of purpose that pushed me out of my bed – be at work to douse a fire, solve a puzzle waiting to be unraveled and bask in the glory of accomplishing it. I had become a slave of my work, designation and routine and did not know what to do with the time I had at my disposal. 

I pushed all these unsettling feeling aside and hid behind my phone, just the way my daughter hid behind me whenever she came across any unknown person. This continued for sometime, till good sense finally prevailed. 

I took charge and pushed myself to not live in the glory of my past accomplishments and  managed to chalk out a rigorous routine, which allowed me to pursue my passion, work as a feelancer, and spend time with my loved ones. Its not all rosey everyday, there are days when I tumble and slip, but then the universe helps me to come back on track…. just like this daily prompt. 

Through this entire process, I realised that I had to learn to train myself on how to deal with ‘Time’. Not waste it in imagining what I would do with it at a future day or time or waste it on thinking of what I did in the past. And this learning and struggle will continue till my time on Earth is up…